More from Ms. Preston as this blog continues to evolve.
Thanks Cathy for the query.
1. I get tired of the constant whining and questions as to why I don’t want to do something. Keep in mind it is not usually that I do NOT want to do something. It is usually that I do not want to do it when they want me to do it…according to their schedules. So, I do it – to keep the peace. (How ironic isn’t it? I do it to keep the peace and only cause internal chaos)
2. doing what pleases me. humm, before the demands of life returned, I had a set schedule. A scheduled block of the day for “me time.” But again the demands of others, work, family cut into that time, so I do not have that time for me anymore. I make every attempt to squeeze some time in for myself. But often, it is not enough.
Something else occured to me: I give in because if not, an argument/discussion/debate ensues and any creative energy that I may have is SUCKED out and I am left with nothing. I can not create anything. My thoughts are chaotic. So I am paralyzed into immobility.
I do know what needs to be done. I am taking steps to do it.
I realise that I have to re-claim that which is mine…peace of mind. What am I prepared to do? Take this by the short hairs and place and ENFORCE boundaries (yeah, I know how you feel about walls) and if necessary remove the disruptive element from that which is my life.
I look back at some of the “work” I’ve done in the past and recall how “happy” I was, how pleased I was and still am. Yet, that joy has been replaced with… angst!
Did that answer your question?
Hey, did I ever answer your question as to where to send your music? Please send it to my gmail acct. I can’t wait. I have the PERFECT idea for a vlog that can only be accented by the musical weaving of the Lady Cathy P. (ooo, another identity)
Have a great day and make it a productive one (in your case, have a great evening)
there is nothing like it.
I love this time of the morning. omgoodness,
nobody on the roads
nobody on the streets
but seriously, this is the time of the day that makes having to deal with the shyte . . . worth it. now is the time when I allow my mind to wander.
senarios are played through.
there are times when I just listen.
was it Vena who said that the world is abuzz with conversation, all you have to do is listen? humm time to re-read RETURN TO ONE.
funny (why do we say “funny” when we aren’t telling a joke?) how when I remember a quote or something, instead of looking JUST for that quote, I re-read the entire piece. (see, that wasn’t “funny” at all)
well the goddess is telling me that I am dragging this out. (how, I just lost a large chunk of text)
type to you later!
our mind and our delusions are formless and colourless. however, our ignorance believing in true existence is harder than a rocky mountain. our felusions are harder than steel.
— Lama Zopa Rinpoche,”The Door to Satisfaction”