Category Archives: WOW

A decision made and one I hope to keep.

With that last blog “Status update becomes a blog,” I’ve made yet another decision. I’m really tired of being bombarded by the less than helpful images and general “news” of the world on my timeline/feed/whatever the hell it’s called, so I am going to change what I want to see on my timeline/feed/whatever the hell it’s called. I’m going to change what I post on my timeline/feed/whatever the hell it’s called. Bye bye, CNN, ABC and the like. I ❤️ ya Huffpost, but you gotta go. Let me put it this way. If it’s not music related, family related, garden related and basic general stuff; I’m not going to post it. After all I don’t and people should not get their “news” from Facebook, Twitter, Flickr and the like.

We’ll see how this works..

✌️ my siblings from another mother✌️

Advertisements

It’s kinda…odd…kinda strano…

To have strangers, strangers who have been allowed to enter your “world” (or at least one of your worlds,) via glimpses of thoughts posted here or there; “know” you and comment on things long since forgotten and to express…

So, a few questions..

is there a point in time when we “become” our online identities?

is your online identity the “authentic” you or a self perception?

have you ever been called out by a “fan” to prove that you “walk the walk and talk the talk?

have you ever wondered “is this, what I’m doing worth it?” but that then leads to other questions.

i’m just curious.

hummm, now shifting gears…

i am going to admit something that some may have already guessed.

i have issues.


yes, i am aware that if one is alive, one has issues. mine are special… 🙂 😆

but there are times when there is a disconnect -brain – no, tactful brain and mouth. there are times when human behaviour baffles the bejeebers out of me. one would think I was reared by emotionless androids or something.

the other day, someone expressed “love.”
not fully understanding, i tried to gloss over it. it did not make sense. “i must have misunderstood,” i thought.
REPEAT
ok, so i did not misunderstand. continue
“so you’re just going to ignore what I said?”
“thank you.”
” ‘thank you’ ???”
“i do not know how to respond.” i really didn’t.

INSERT CHIRPING CRICKETS

to make a longer story shorter, after being told why i was stunned.

as a rule, i don’t tell people how to feel or what to feel it’s not my place to tell anyone how they should feel. in this case. i could not remain silent.

“you do not know me to feel this way. we’ve never met and most likely never will. if my banter and conversations have lead you to believe otherwise, i apologise. but , if you look at it realistically, i am – to you, as you are – to me, a collection of photographs, screen captures and witticisms that don’t even scratch the surface of who we are. for you to say what you said makes no sense to me and continued discussion will only make me uncomfortable.”

that’s the gist of my reply. then the reply to the reply. then I stopped because continued discourse would only add paraffin to the fire.

this is the reason for the above q and a.

but now i am left with questions…not about that – that was just silly. but I wonder how many online “relationships (of romantic nature)” begin as such? there isn’t any way such a thing can last, can it?

heavy sigh…heavy sigh

i’m going to bed.

a pui tardi!

wowzers – I am where I am…

because I do not want to be “alone. If something should burst or pop … whatever it could do, will do…I won’t be found -partially decomposed.

Don’t misunderstand, there are other, less selfish reasons I remain tethered. But the main one is that, although I’ve been “prepared” to die since I’m 12/14, I’m not, I don’t want to be alone.

Of late, I’ve been thinking about children and how I don’t have any. Not that I want any now…are you crazy??? 😆

I have become “that guy.” If I want to recall something of great import; I must make a note. That became even more apparent Sunday. I had to ask the server his name, at least four times.

I have been getting out and about more and more. My days are carefully mapped out to allow maximum enjoyment for me and minimal discomfort ..well, for me. 😊
To be perfectly “honest” with you, other than this thing in the head, for once in what seems like a very long time, I feel fine. NO LIE😜😆😀 I’m feeling so fine, that next week, I’m resuming my workout. Oh yeah baby! 💪💪

I have started downsizing. My once full closets are looking kinda sparse. I’ve been able to give a lot of my trousers to a friend. I’ll never wear a 40 again ( \o/ yay!! \O/) and some shirts! I’ve suitcases of stuff to go through. I’ve also been shredding old documents, letters, cards whatever like I’m an old world spy or something. 👤

Well, I’m off out!

a pui tardi!

I am a liar, plain and simple.

I put on a happy face.
I say, “I’m fine, doing much better.”
Sometimes, I lie to myself.

I say to myself, “today is going to be a better day.”
And, admittedly, it is.
Until I move.

I’m not fine.
My body is broken.
My brain betrays me…almost 24/7.
I ache physically.
I ache spiritually.
I ache.

My senses betray me.
Is this real?

I am a liar.
I’m not fine.
I am dying.
Yeah, I know.
We’re all dying.
It’s the normal conclusion to existence.
Mine is accelerated.

If everything is going to be “ok,”
Why as I type this
Tears are streaming down my face?

I am a liar to those who ask after my health.
I am not “fine.”
It’s not going to be “ok.”
I am going to die.
I am.

I don’t want to.
I’ve not thrown in the towel.
But, I’m tired.
No, not tired.
I am exhausted.

But, I’ll get up.
Wash my face.
Put on a smile.
And say,

I’m fine.
Thanks for asking.

LIAR!

Peace eludes me today.

Ciao, ciao
A pui tardi.

Yeah, it’s that time #photoadayApril

A few hrs early, but it’s in the bag…been put to bed.

#photoadayApril

Gearing up for…..

20120430-031916.jpg

The February Photo A Day challenge….

Hey!

Yeah, I did complete the #febphotoaday challenge. I noticed that I stopped posting them here on 8 Feb. Well, here is a link to the completed challenge.

#febphotoaday

🙂

a pui tardi

20120306-074608.jpg

1 February 2012 – my view today

20120201-112251.jpg

20120201-112259.jpg

a pui tardi